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To the person in the library this morning with your dick out by rpsulli85in AdviceAnimals

[–]jakemg 2 points3 points ago

What if I told you

People who don't own computers also enjoy masturbation.

In response to the recent r/Atheism posts that keep showing up in r/all by joetheschmoe4000in AdviceAnimals

[–]jakemg 23 points24 points ago

I'd go on to say that they're also not mutually exclusive.

NBA Rookie of the Year Kyrie Irving dresses as old man, schools everyone on the playground by octop3nisin videos

[–]jakemg 0 points1 point ago

That was actually a really well written ad. The whole thing pretty much never mentions Pepsi and then the slogan ties that long, and awesome, part where the old man schools everyone directly to their product.

Pepsi Max: a zero calorie Cola in disguise.

Pretty genius.

What were the days after 9/11 like? by argonautsin AskReddit

[–]jakemg 1 point2 points ago

I was 21 and working at a bank as well. This sums it all up pretty perfectly.

Plan on making french toast tomorrow, so I made some challah bread tonight. My house smells amazing by pablozamorasin food

[–]jakemg 0 points1 point ago

That's what I came to say, but I'm sure it's still delicious! :)

This still bothers me by cheepo888in AdviceAnimals

[–]jakemg 0 points1 point ago

Mind = blown

Seriously.

Cake day. Here's the most fucked up thing I own. She was a gift made by & from my uncle. Her ass is huge, she's life sized, her name is Chelsea and she's supposed to resemble me. by newsdaylaura18in WTF

[–]jakemg 8 points9 points ago

Does it have, you know,............genitals?

How I felt 5 minutes into my biochemistry exam. by loposaurusin gifs

[–]jakemg 0 points1 point ago

I hope you're a guy because that would make this a lot funnier.

I got out of the Marine Corps today, which afforded me a rare opportunity. This is me, standing next to literally all of my worldly possessions. by Monster-_-in pics

[–]jakemg 1 point2 points ago

Relish that my friend. That's all a man needs.

IAmA Former Gameroom Employee of Chuck. E. Cheese. I saw a lot there. It was nuts. AMA. by jakemgin IAmA

[–]jakemg[S] 0 points1 point ago

One of those, though there was no Orland store.

Don't do trees they said. It will kill your brain they said. by Richard_Cranium11in trees

[–]jakemg 1 point2 points ago

I got a 34 with zero preparation. I think OP should retake it in the hopes of doing better on the essay and science portion. In fact, had he done just a little better on the essay, he'd be in better shape overall.

You float on a throne of lies by wordsandstuffsin funny

[–]jakemg 2 points3 points ago

My upvote went less for the gif (it was okay) and more for the title making it much, much funnier.

A family friend was busking on the street when an 8-year-old blind-autistic boy stopped to have a listen. by I_Hate_Reddit_in Music

[–]jakemg 1 point2 points ago

What this world needs is more assholes like you.

Very well said, sir (or madam).

A family friend was busking on the street when an 8-year-old blind-autistic boy stopped to have a listen. by I_Hate_Reddit_in Music

[–]jakemg 3 points4 points ago

He's probably going to want to get those other albums in stock or available digitally, as I would've bought them all if they were available. He might as well take this opportunity to make a little cash for his talent.

A family friend was busking on the street when an 8-year-old blind-autistic boy stopped to have a listen. by I_Hate_Reddit_in Music

[–]jakemg -1 points0 points ago

Who. The fuck. Is cutting onions again?

Finnish court: open WiFi owners not responsible for copyright infringement by KAPT_Kipperin technology

[–]jakemg 0 points1 point ago

This is one of those rare times when a redditor posts a boingboing article rather than a boingboing employee getting paid to repost things from reddit.

Computer Experts: What's a computer trick you think everyone should know? by jojojokin AskReddit

[–]jakemg 0 points1 point ago

My office is (finally) converting to Win7 in a month or so. I'm sending this on to our Director of IT. Super easy to use. Thanks!

Florida cop pulls over a black dude for a busted taillight. Black dude then tries to eat his weed, but the cop catches him in the process. Bet you won't guess how that ended. by binarydarkstarin videos

[–]jakemg 0 points1 point ago

I was really surprised that he didn't do anything about the weed. It seems like at the end, he just gave him a ticket for the tail light...

My favorite gif ever. by infiniteatbestin gifs

[–]jakemg 1 point2 points ago

I'm really happy that the dog ended up getting unstuck.

I'll give her some Coke.... by Highwinds129385in videos

[–]jakemg 10 points11 points ago

I dabble with languages, so she actually did think I was learning Korean. But I'll gladly be part of the shit show.

I'll give her some Coke.... by Highwinds129385in videos

[–]jakemg 1 point2 points ago

I was more interested in the cigarettes.

I'll give her some Coke.... by Highwinds129385in videos

[–]jakemg 2 points3 points ago

I'm from Chicago. We say pop, even though the chart shows we say it many different ways. It's pop, motherfucker.

I'll give her some Coke.... by Highwinds129385in videos

[–]jakemg 196 points197 points ago

It's 6:30 AM and my wife and son just came downstairs to hear, in a Korean accent, "Please give me cock...please give me cock. Please give me cigarette, please give me cock." She was surprised to see that I was learning to speak a foreign language.

My friend thought it be fun to go on the "baby" swings at the park and this happened..... by sleepysnowboarderin funny

[–]jakemg 0 points1 point ago

Was I the only one who watched that video and felt really bad for the kid? A huge crowd of people were standing around teasing him while he's terrified because he's stuck.

My friend thought it be fun to go on the "baby" swings at the park and this happened..... by sleepysnowboarderin funny

[–]jakemg 0 points1 point ago

Why not grab the bar up top, have your friends hold the seat, and pull up and out?

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